In the fall of 2015, William, whom I had worked and collaborated with extensively, asked me if I would assist him with a very personal project. Listening to his deep and authentic intentions and his openness to letting the project unfold naturally, I said yes. 

We woke before the sun and drove in ceremonial silence. 

It is a deep honor to be entrusted with facilitating, witnessing and documenting someone in their vulnerable process of transformation. But rather than share my experiences, I want to share William’s own account of this personal ritual:

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A dance with the unknown. (2015)

“Looking back on these photos many things come to mind, mostly symbolism of where I was in my life in relationship to this session. I remember feeling as though I had lost a sense of my inner self. Within my expression of love I had fallen out of balance. I was so focused on giving that I forgot how to really receive love from others or myself. This activated wounds that had been feeding off my fears of not being enough, or not being worthy of love.   

I was very interested in the art form of Butoh.  Although I had never trained in this medium, I found it to be so visceral and captivating. It was like watching someone embody their shadow; opening themselves up to expressing the parts of the self that are kept behind closed doors –ahat we would commonly see as ugly or grotesque on the surface. As an artist I have always been fascinated with the idea of channeling – a practice of opening, allowing the body to be an instrument and allowing the energies moving through to be the musician.

My intention for this session was to be vulnerable, to surrender to whatever wanted to be released through my physical body at that time. I went into the day without knowing what was going to happen, but understanding that it was a ritual; perhaps a purge. 

A landscape of tree trunks still rooted into the dry cracked soil. These trunks felt like a reflection of my beliefs that were no longer serving me; they had been cut off from the sun’s light basking them in love, and no longer could receive nutrients from the earth’s pulse below.”

- William

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Thank you, William, for your willingness to step into the unknown and for sharing your process.